I need to discuss something. Something that I’ve never seen discussed anywhere. Perhaps because all moms fear it so much they won’t even whisper the word, let alone discuss it with their friends…
What could strike such terror within the hearts of otherwise courageous and fearless women?
The fluke puke.
Ugh. Even typing it makes my arm hair stand up.
You are all doing your thing, and someone coughs. Then it comes. Puke. Ugh. Oh no. Is it a stomach virus? Are we going to be quarantined for a week? Or more?
But wait. There was a cough. Your eyes open wide. Maybe it was just the fluke puke.
On one hand, fluke pukes are awesome. It means there won’t be vomit everywhere. It means you may actually get to go in that mom’s night out that you have been planning for months.
And there’s a big but.
The fluke puke is so terrifying because you just don’t know. You’ll live next 24 hours in fear. Any time your kid makes a quick moment your heart sinks and you say to yourself, “Welp. There’s that. He’s going to barf his BRAT diet everywhere.” But then there’s nothing. Maybe you just got lucky though. Every sad face, “Yep. Here it comes. Banana puke.” But nope, he’s just whizzed that Mickey Mouse is over. Do you go anywhere? What if he pukes all over the grocery store? Do you chance it? Do you TELL ANYONE?! What if they treat you like you have the plague? Oh you know it’s coming. If you even mention puke people go running for the hills.
Ugh. The Fluke Puke. It’s almost just as bad as the stomach bug.
This year I’m actually doing the half marathon! I’m scared out of my mind. I’ve been having dreams about it. Ask my friends, it’s basically all I can talk about.
But for this mama, 13.1 is a long, long way. Coming from a point where I couldn’t do a mile in under 17 minutes to my last training session doing 10 in 15 minute miles I’ve come a long way. That doesn’t take the fear away… but I know I’m preparing as much as I can.
The truth is, I would have never done this on my own. I wouldn’t have sought out to do it if it weren’t for one thing: Sophie & Madigan’s Playground. This charity is close to my heart because it was formed after my best friend’s daughters passed in a house fire in January of 2013. Their passing spurred their family to come up with the idea of a huge playground to be built in Frederick, MD for families to come together and make memories that will last a long time. I say it a lot, but it’s the truth… sometimes memories are all you have. That’s why this park is so important. Not only that though, the charity seeks to help families to play, learn and create. We’ve held a ton of amazing events with that focus. To help families create long lasting memories.
So as I get each mile under my shoes, I try to remember why I’m doing it. When I don’t want to, when it’s too cold out, when I’m exhausted I look down and remember Sophie and Madigan. Sophie’s laugh. Madigan’s love for babies (including Max). The way they played with the boys. I don’t want to let them down. Each mile is important.
If you so feel called, please consider a donating to Sophie & Madigan’s Playground. My goal this year was a very lofty 6,000 but I’ll be happy about any cent raised for this cause.
Recently I was asked to write a blog on parenting and family.
At first I really wasn’t sure what I could write about. Maybe our family closet? Or maybe how I handle four crazy boys? Or maybe how I try to keep my house clean? None of it sounded terribly exciting…
And then I was in Target with Max and he had no pants on and was sticking his feet out of the cart. Aha! The Honey Badger Parenting was born!
You can read the article on my friend Maggie’s blog here: http://www.beingonpurpose.me/#!Guest-Post-Honey-Badger-Parenting/c1rfl/CF91AF13-B79F-4256-9AE7-452AE1FB5C3A
So things have changed so much over the last year. We’ve decided to put our house on the market, our kids have all gotten larger, and I’ve settled into the role of praise and worship leader at our church. I have been crazy busy and as you all know, balance is hard.
I’ve decided to examine who and where I want to be in this life. I want to be more present, and I want to do the things that my heart calls out to do. One of these things is being a doula. I had a really hard time balancing life when Dixon was born. We had just lost the girls a few weeks prior when I found out I was pregnant. Life was hard. In the year since he’s been here though, I’ve found balance was so hard to find. That’s one of the places I really struggle with. I like to be everything for everyone all the time and now through therapy I’ve found that just isn’t possible. I have to have priorities. I have to say no to good things sometimes. And I have to create a balance that may not work for anyone else but does work for my family.
Being a doula is one of those areas. I would love to have a thriving business being a doula, but this is just not the season for us. So while my heart cries out to help women in birth, I’ve decided that I can make it work without making my family struggle. Being a doula is something I feel called to do, but the business aspect was just not working for me. I support all doulas who charge, so that isn’t where this is coming from. It’s truly coming from a place where my heart can be happy, I can be happy doing what I love, without the aspects that stress me out. So I have decided to become a not for profit doula. I also am dramatically limiting the number of births I attend. I don’t know exactly what this will look like as I’m trying to figure it all out, but I know that it has to look like something I can be happy with. Serving women in pregnancy and labor is something my heart desires, the business part isn’t, for now. Maybe that will change in a year, who knows. But for now I’ve found peace in it.